Fall To Pieces Redone
by annieapple24
Summary: I redid this story because it sucked. I hope its better now. Hermione finds herself tied to a bed in the Room of Requirement with Draco Malfoy. Rated M for rape an violence. Dont like, dont read. Very very ooc and au
1. Chapter 1

A/N: So I wrote this story like a year ago, and put it up on this site. until I realized it sucked. So I'm rewriting with everything alot better and if I do everything right, it will be alot longer, and alot less flames will be in my reviews. I have my fingers crossed that my writing skills have improved.

So anyway, one of the big problems was it was my first fic and I didn't even know what OOC was until I got enough reviews yelling at me about it I asked one of my friends and found out it was Out Of Character. Well I guess I'll warn you now so if you flame about it, you are a horrible dick who deserves to die. No I'm just kidding, you only deserve to be tortured and live the rest of your life in a wheelchair. No I'm kidding about that too. I'm just scared I'll get as bad reception with this version as my old one.

So ending my nervous babble, I'll give my warnings of: THIS STORY CONTAINS RAPE. DONT LIKE, DONT READ, DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT FLAMING. Also this is OOC and probably to most people AU even though to me AU means alien universe or Draco is a vampire. idk. anyway theres violence and a bunch of stuff like that.

I don't own either. Even though we all wish we had our own personal Draco.

So here, the new and improved Fall To Pieces!

* * *

We walked to the Great Hall together, holding hands. As we did every day.

He whispered into my ear "I love you Hermione." As he did every day.

I felt the guilt fill in my stomach. As I did every damn day.

Then I'd whisper back "I love you too, Ron." knowing we meant that in two very different ways. That was the worst part of this daily routine. It wasn't lying really, because I did love him, just not in the way he thought I meant it.

I tried to distract myself by staring absently at the others hurrying along to breakfast. I saw Gryffindors; Ginny, Neville, Dean and Seamus walking near and waved to all of them. I saw Luna from Ravenclaw and waved to her as well.

Then I saw a flash of silver. There were eyes staring into mine. I was hypnotized. It seemed like years I was lost in those silver pools. But minutes later I realized the eyes belonged to the man who had made my life hell for my whole Hogwarts career. Draco Malfoy.

I looked away, but he already noticed me. I saw his smirk spread across his lips.

"'Mione?" I heard Ron's voice. I hated it when he called me that. I don't know why, but it was just creepy.

"Sorry... I got lost in a daydream." I said distantly.

He shrugged and continued to talk to Harry, leaving me to what he thought was basking in a daydream. But in reality, I was trying to figure out why I couldn't get Draco Malfoy out of my head.

By then we were sitting down at our table. Ron loaded his plate with every food in sight. I grabbed a piece of toast and nibbled lightly. 'His eyes were shaped perfectly, filled with pure silver.'

I turned around to glance at the Slytherin table. He and Blaise were arguing about something. Pansy was trying to break up the fight by puffing out her lips and trying to drag Malfoy away... probably to some empty classroom to shag.

I turned back and ate the rest of my toast. I knew I had a really important extra credit Ancient Runes assignment.

"Hey, I'm off to the library guys. I'll meet you at the common room after practice. If I'm not back by six, I got crushed by a pile of books." I joked.

"M'kay," Ron mumbled through a piece of toast. He said something else but it was too muffled by his food that I couldn't understand him.

I walked out into the hallway and turned left to the library. The school was silent, since everyone was eating or roaming the grounds outside, basking in the last of the autumn air.

Then, from behind me I heard footsteps. I turned to see who else had left breakfast early, but no one was there.

I had the feeling that someone was watching me. Someone was there. I took a few steps closer. There was an indent in the wall, just the right size for someone to hide in. I walked a few more steps closer. I heard a breath hitch. Whoever it was, they knew I realized they were there.

I worked up the courage and walked all the way up to the indent with my hand on my wand. But before I could see or do anything, something jumped out at me and I was out cold.

* * *

I woke up in a bed. My entire body ached, mostly my wrists and ankles. I realized I was tied to the bed, but I couldn't break free. The ropes held tight.

I looked around. The room I was in was surprisingly small and comfy. It had faded wood walls, and a soft red carpet. There was a fireplace across the room and a fluffy looking red plush couch between it and the bed. Then I saw someone sitting on the couch, staring into the fire. I held back a gasp.

I looked closer and saw the person had platinum blonde hair. It was him. Malfoy was my stalker and attacker. Why did he tie me to the bed?

I couldn't move. All I could do was stare at him as he looked into the fire. His hair seemed to be glowing in the firelight. It was transfixing. I almost didn't notice whn he sighed and stood up.

That's when he noticed my eyes were open. I expected his sad look to disappear and turn to a mask of anger, but it never did. He hesitated for a moment, then walked over to the bed.

He sat next to me, turning and looking into my eyes. He looked so sad and helpless, but I knew not to fall for it, and tried to expect the unexpected. I sensed danger.

"Hermione… Hermione…" He said my name over and over.

"Malfoy, why am I tied to the bed? Where are we?" I demanded.

"We're in the Room of Requirement of course. I wanted a place I could talk to you. Somewhere we wouldn't be interrupted, but also comfortable. An empty classroom wouldn't work. I also asked that time wouldn't pass while we were here, so it would be like we never left." He said softly, so I could barely hear.

"So why am I tied to the bed?" I asked softly. My gut was still expecting something bad to happen.

"Didn't want you running off when you woke up. Simple as that." He said even quieter this time.

"Then why don't you untie me. I'm awake, and I won't run off."

He shook his head. He looked at me again, but this time, I looked to, but was paralyzed by those silver eyes.

When I shook myself out of my chance, I realized I was being stupid. I was having a calm conversation with a guy who kidnapped me and tied me to a bed in a room where supposedly time wouldn't pass, who quite possibly might be crying. What the hell was I doing?

"Malfoy, let me go. You know I can hurt you. I even know wandless magic so tying me me up and stealing my wand won't help you." I said firmly, even though it was a lie.

He shook his head and smiled. "You're a horrible liar Hermione."

I heard a whisper, this time too quiet for me to hear. Another something down his cheek.

I tried to lean forward, but was pulled back by my ties. "What did you say?"

He growled. "I… I… lo… I can't say it! I can't say it!" He cried. He stood up quickly, and stormed to the fireplace, leaning against the wall and again staring into the flames.

"Hermione… I know I've been an awful dickhead all these years, but did you ever think maybe it wasn't because I hated you?"

"What do you mean… Draco?" I was hesitant to say his first name, but I did.

"Just forget it. It doesn't matter."

"Draco, you knocked me out, dragged me here, tied me up, for what? Tell me what you need to tell me! I don't want to fucking sit here until I'm an old lady!" I demanded.

"And just what are you going to do about it!" He shouted.

I wasn't expecting him to yell back, but I was getting angry. He didn't have any right doing any of this bullshit.

"Well it's not like you're giving me too many options! You should really just fucking let me go because you have no right to do any of this bullshit, you fucking bastard!" I yelled.

"You probably shouldn't call me that Granger," He said dangerously low, I noticed he didn't call me Hermione, "I can hurt you a hell of alot worse than you can hurt me."

"Fuck you!" I spit in his face.

He wiped it off and slapped me. "You're nothing but a mudblood bitch, Granger. And you're gonna pay for that little act."

He grabbed my neck, pushing me into the bed. Black spots were forming in my eyes and I couldn't breathe. I slapped his hand trying to get him to stop. Then, he did. He stopped for a moment, but then decided to continue. He whipped out his wand and said a wordless spell. Before I had time to either be impressed or fear this incredible level of magic, I realized I was suddenly naked.

He jumped on top of me, and I realized he too was naked. This was the danger I had been sensing. I was about to be raped by Draco Malfoy.

He didn't wait to do anything, he just got himself hard, and shoved right in. I felt my entire body rip in half, or at least that's how it felt. I screamed, tears flooding my eyes. I could feel blood and lots of it.

I could only feel pain, until I realized I wasn't the only one crying. Malfoy was buried inside me, but he did not move a muscle. He was crying, with incoherent apologies mixed in. He tried to wipe away my tears, but by then all that was in my head was confusion. It made no sense at all.

Finally, he whispered "I'm sorry, so sorry. Let me just… It'll hurt I'm sorry. I'll do it fast." He pulled all the way out of me, another wave of pain ripped across my body, but not as bad.

"Hermione, I'm so sorry." He blubbered.

Then he kissed me. A real kiss like I've never experienced before. One of those kisses with every emotion ever created inside. That's when I realized what he had been trying to tell me.

He grabbed his wand again, this time to clean up the mess he made. He scourgified the blood from our bodies. Then he did something else I was so glad for. He made the pain disappear. It was like it never happened. He then went back to weeping.

"Hermione… I love you." He whispered.

My mind was numb. It was too much to take in in less than a minute.

"No you don't." I whispered. "If you did you would've met me in the library and just talked to me like a normal person, not kidnap and rape me."

As soon as I said it, my numbness broke. I broke down sobbing.

I realized the ropes were gone when he tried to hug me, but I kicked him off.

As soon as I thought I could move, I jumped from the bed and ran to the door.

* * *

A/N: To those who read the first version I ask, is it any better? I hope. She didn't fall in love yet, and she won't for awhile.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you for the reviews. Thank you for none of them being flames :) I was very happy when I woke up and saw four reviews already, and on Christmas eve too. Anyway, I'm bored and home alone on this sucky day, so I decided to update my stories.

Here's chapter 2! :) Merry Christmas!

* * *

I ran as fast I could toward the door until suddenly, I was falling toward the floor, unable to move. The fucker used a full body bind on me.

I felt him pick me up and put me on the couch. It was fluffy.

"Go to sleep Hermione, you need it." Malfoy whispered, closing my eyes.

I couldn't reopen them, I was forced to lie there with my eyes closed for what felt like hours. After a long time I heard him sigh.

"You aren't sleeping are you? Well I can help you with that. I felt him open my mouth and pour something down my throat. He massaged my throat so I wouldn't choke.

Automatically, I felt very tired and almost fell asleep instantly. I was only awake long enough to feel him drape a blanket over me. Then I was out cold for the second time today.

I woke up on something very fluffy. I wondered if I had fallen asleep in the commonroom after everyone else was asleep. I've done that before.

I open my eyes and saw a fireplace. But it was alot different than the common room. Then I remembered everything that had happened since breakfast.

I went to sit up until I realized there were arms around me. I froze. He had crawled on the couch behind me. This was getting way too creepy.

I broke out of his grip, and jumped off he couch. He woke up suddenly.

I ran toward the door again, and this time was tackled by his heavy body. I couldn't breathe.

* * *

A/N: Sorry this is so short, I was planning on writing more, but my step mom just brought home food and I'm hungry. So anyway, be proud of me, she didn't fall in love in this chapter either :) peas and cheese review! :):)


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: I know it's been months and forever, but computer access long enough to type is rare and used for other things. I apologize._

_To make up for this I'm going to try and write as much as I humanly can right now._

_It's past midnight. I'm sleepy. But I'm doing it for any fan out there who is dying for me to finish._

_So I don't own HP, though if I did I would be very happy. And I hope this chapter will be enough to make up for my absense._

_..._

I hated him. It made me sick. How could he do this to a person? To someone he tried to say he loved? Disgusting. I wanted to puke as I watched him pace near the chair that i was currently tied up to.

"How could you?" I spat at him.

He turned around, but he had that sad look again.

I rolled my eyes. "Don't play that sad ass shit on me. Just tell me what the hell gave you the idea that kidnapping and raping a person is okay? How could you do this to me?" Atear ran from the corner of my eye.

He plopped down on the couch and buried his face in his hands.

I didn't exactly know what I was expecting when I said that. After staring at him for awhile, I turned my head and tried to get comfy on the old wooden chair. I just wanted to get away from this. From everything. I just didn't know how. What could I do? I'm a witch, but I can do nothing to make this any better. Nothing.

But then something surprised me. Malfoy's voice.

"My father. He fucked me up royally if you can't tell. Not that that is an excuse. But if you want me to defend myself, I'd blame it all on him."

I went to yell that it was all bullshit, but he continued quickly.

"Of course, I'm not defending myself. I know I'm a worthless piece of shit. Your boyfriend has reminded me of that countless times."

Ron? Did Malfoy just say Ron was right when he said bad things about him? That's odd. Well everything that has happened today is odd. Horribly dramatic. Something I would read on that muggle internet site called fanfiction. And it sucked having to live it.

"Ron?"

"Yes! Ron! The lucky fucker that gets a huge family, a house that can be rich without costing any money, and a beautiful girlfriend. Not to mention a load of friends that aren't either evil or trying to jump his bones every night! Fuck!"

He stood up so suddenly it frightened me. I didn't even think to notice he called me beautiful.

"You're jealous of Ron?" I said as loudly as I could, (which was about a whisper.)

He didn't answer. He stared into the fire again like when I first woke up in the bed.

I wanted to stop talking about all of this. I wanted to stop thinking about it too. But I couldn't.

"Are you hungry?" He asked suddenly.

I heard my stomach growl when he mentioned food, but my mind was whirling with questions I needed answered.

"I want you to tell me why you blame your father. I don't get it. He didn't rape me." I didn't mean for the last sentence to come out so bitchy. Not that I didn't have the right, I just didn't mean to.

"Over lunch, I'll tell you everything I need to know. Let me just get us some."

I expected a kitchen to pop up somewhere in back, but instead, Malfoy took off his shoe and sock. A bright noen pink sock.

I would've laughed if I wasn't so damn confused.

He put back on his shoe and called out to no one "Hey Dobby? Could you bring me some food? Sandwiches and tea would be just fine."

He smiled and sat on the couch, conjuring a table.

Wait. Dobby? House elf Dobby? Well house elves could probably get through the time stop thing considering their amount of power. But Dobby? Didn't Malfoy abuse Dobby for all those years?

Moments later the little house elf named Dobby popped into the room laden with dozens of sandwiches and several pots of tea.

"Here you are sir." Dobby said.

"Dobby I've told you a million times, call me Draco." Malfoy smiled.

Meanwhile, I was staring at the whole thing open mouthed at the scene. What the hell...?

"Would you like anything else Master Malfoy?" Malfoy gave him a playful glare.

"No thank you."

Dobby nodded and popped off smiling.

"So Hermione, can I untie you so we can eat?"

...

_A/N: Please review so I know if I'm improving or if I need to work harder._

_Hope you enjoyed. :)_


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Okay so I got some great suggestions that I am going to try to use but I may not use them the way that person wanted and I'm sorry. :) I hope you guys still like it. :) I love reading my reviews and I hope I get alot more after posting this. If I have time I'm going to update my other story too. God it's been forever :) Please enjoy:) By the way this will be considered OOC for Draco but this is just how I want him. In the story. You know what I mean :)

... **Draco's POV**

I couldn't help staring at her. Hermione looked so beautiful sitting in the chair. She was eating a sandwich and I could see her pearly white teeth tear into it, her juicy pink lips as she chewed, and her tongue dart out to catch a crumb after swallowing. It was a glorious sight.

It had taken what felt like an hour to convince her to eat. My watch (which had kept ticking even though time had stopped,) said we had been in this room for almost eight hours, and she needed to eat.

I watched for a little bit longer as she finished her sandwich and grabbed another hungrily.

"Okay, I've eaten and I'm untied and staying put. Tell me what you need to tell me." Hermione said seriously, taking a bite.

Truthfully I have no idea why she was staying. Curiosity I guess. That's why she reads so much and actually pays attention in class. Well I'm happy I don't have to tackle her again.

"Well first and foremost, I blame him because of this..." I slowly began to roll up my left sleeve. I had put our clothes back on after the second time I knocked her out.

I slowly uncovered the black mark I had previously hidden with a charm. I heard her gasp.

The Dark Mark. My ugly and very permanent reminder of everything I hated about myself.

I leaned back into the couch remembering the searing pain as the dark lord burned it into my skin.

_The cool tip of his wand touched my forearm. Almost immediately the pain flooded into my arm causing my knees to buckle. My arm felt like it was on fire._

_My father caught me and whispered "Show no pain Draco, you are better than that."_

_I smoothed my face with difficulty to hide. The dark lord smiled and laughed deeply. I felt like screaming._

And suddenly I was back in the room with Hermione who was staring at the mark still.

"It wasn't my decision. I had no say in the matter. My father pushed it, saying I was old enough, but was really just trying to cover his own ass. So had I refused I'd be dead."

The beautiful woman was silent, tears still stained on her face from everything that had happened.

"Okay I know that's still not enough. The mark really only makes the evil inside me more evil. So who turned me into a monster. No, who raised me to be a monster?"

Still no answer but I didn't really want her too.

"My father."

_I was so excited about the letter that had been delivered today. I was excepted into Hogwarts! _

_My mother and father were very proud. Or pretended to be. I know they just paid lots of money so I could go, but I was still so excited._

_I walked downstairs for lunch and was greeted at the bottom by my father carrying an odd shaped parcel with a sheet draped over it._

_"Hello Draco. I have a present for you." My father said unsmiling._

_I went to grab for it but he smacked my hand away._

_"No, let us go out to the garden first. Do you have your wand?"_

_I proudly produced the shiny new wand we had bought yesterday._

_"Come."_

_I followed him out to the garden, wondering idly what the sheet could be hiding._

_My father stopped between the roses and the hibiscus._

_He handed me the parcel which I threw off the sheet with impatience. Inside was a black horned owl with yellow eyes and a sharp beak. It was beautiful. A very handsome owl which must've been bred with care and cost a fortune. I marvelled at this._

_"Now Draco, I want you to take it out of the cage and kill it."_

_"What?"_

_"You heard me boy."_

_"But why? Isn't a present? Why would we kill it?"_

_"Not we. You. And you need not know why. All you need to know is how. Say the words 'Avada Kadarva' while pointing it. And you must want to kill it or it won't work."_

_"But I don't want to."_

_"You must do as I say or you will be punished severly!"_

_I sadly turned toward the cage and admired the owl once again. It truely was an amazing bird._

_Slowly and reluctantly I open the cage and forced it onto the ground._

_I pointed my wand at it and muttered "Avada Kedarva" but nothing happened. I tried again. And again. But the owl just sat patiently, turning it's head this way and that._

_I looked at my father fearfully. I could see his rage boiling._

_"You imputant little boy! Kill it now or you shall be punished! Kill it!" He screamed. His hand smacked my cheek with such a force I was knocked down to the ground and had tears in my eyes._

_My cheek stung and my body ached where I had landed on the ground._

_I stood again and pointed my wand at the bird again. I wished it were dead just so I wouldn't get hit again. If it would only just die._

_"Avada Kedarva." I muttered again._

_And it hit the ground unmoving. My father kicked it._

_"Well done."_

I realized suddenly that I was rubbing my cheek and sat up. Hermione was still staring at me questioningly.

I then told her the story of killing the bird and other pretty horrible stories. I even told her about when he made me torture cats and dogs and anything else he could find in a wizzard or muggle pet shop.

By the end she looked sick. I worried she might pass out but decided she would be fine. She was tough.

"So what about Dobby?"

The question was unexpected, having nothing to do with me being forced to torture animals, it startled me.

"What?"

"Dobby? Why were you being nice to him? Didn't you torure him too?"

I burst out laughing at the accusation. But then I thought about it and it seemed pretty legitimate. I very well should've.

"What!" She demanded, angered by my laughing.

"Well, it's a long story. Dobby was my best friend."

_I sat in my room crying, nursing my angry red cheek and my probably broken arm._

_I heard a pop and turned to see the house elf limping towards me with a rag and a bowl of water._

_"Hello Dobby." I said showing him my bloody arm._

_"Hello Master Malfoy." He said quietly before soaking water into the rag and gently wiping away the blood._

_"Why don't you just magic it away?" I asked. _

_"It heals better this way. Dobby's not sure why."_

_"Oh."_

_I sat quietly trying not to moan as he wiped._

_"Here comes the painful part." Dobby warned pointing his finger ready at my arm._

_I held my breath and felt the bone crack back into place. I bit my tongue._

_"Thank you very much Dobby."_

_"Your welcome sir."_

_"Dobby, would you like to play a game of Wizzard's Chess with me?" I asked cautiously._

_"If the young master wants me to." He replied._

_"Good. You are so going to lose." I smiled._

"Best friends?" She asked suspiciously.

"Yeah." I said smiling.

...

A/N: I know that was a sucky spot to end, but this chapter is gettin long and my roommate just got home and we're grabbin lunch. Hope you enjoyed :) I'll try to update soon.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I just published a chapter to m other story, let's see if I can do one more for this one :) Hope you enjoy! Chapter 5.

...

I sat trying to order my thoughts, knowing they were too jumbled to ever make sense no matter how long I analyzed them. So many questions filled my head, only to be rejected as stupid or useless.

What was he playing at? I knew, he was trying to make me feel sorry for him so I wouldn't run off and tell the headmaster and get him expelled. Well I guess I should be ashamed of myself. It was working.

Of course I've always had a soft spot for creatures in need. I formed S.P.E.W. because of that instinct to protect. But Draco Malfoy? He was probably lying anyways.

The fact that he claimed to be best friends with Dobby just ruined my train of thought. Everything made since up until that part. Dobby acted so happy to see him, so happy to help him, almost like the way he acts around Harry.

Maybe once I get out of this mess I'll ask him myself, just to subdue the curiousity.

"Hermione." His voice startled me out of my thoughts. I thought he was done talking.

"Hermione," He said again, "I really have anger issues. I once broke Pansy Parkinson's arm because she accused me of sleeping with another girl while we were dating. Smart girl broke it off after that. I apologized and we're just friends now, but I'll always feel so bad about it.

"It's not something I can control. Sometimes I just see red and charge like an angry bull until whatever pissed me off is done. It doesn't even have to be a big thing. Crabbe once asked for one of the rolls off my plate, and I started punching him. I don't even understand it."

"Why are you telling me all this?" I asked. _Just to confuse you and fuck up your head more than it is now._

"Because it would be so easy for me to start doing something I'll regret later too you. So easy. And I don't want to." He said, staring into the fire.

"Okay, then can I leave so we don't risk you killing me or something?" I asked, scared to mention that he might rape me again. And what the hell was I going to do once I got out of here?

He stood and sighed a heavy sigh. "Unfortunately, I'm very selfish. I grew up getting everything, well, mostly everything I wanted. And I know you hate me, but I need to try to make you understand how much I... How much I don't hate you."

"Please Malfoy, just let me go. I promise I won't tell anyone. Just let me go, please. Please." I begged. I pulled my feet up onto the chair and rested my head on my knees. "I just want to leave. Please let me go."

He looked away from me again. "No. Now that I have you, you aren't going anywhere."

He sat back down, and looked back into the fire, avoiding my eyes.

I kept staring, hoping if he looked up, he would see how desparate I was and let me go. Of course this wouldn't happen, but I had to try.

The problem was, the more I stared at him, the more I didn't even want to look away. He had bothered to put a shirt on, but it was a very thin cotton tee. I could see his lean chest and sculpted body. His arms were muscular, but also lean. A seeker's body. His hair had grown and was long enough to cover his face, but his silver eyes glowed in the firelight.

My hands gripped the arms of the chair as a semi-familiar feeling crept into my body. It was the same feeling I got when I saw Viktor Krum working out, seeing his muscles. The same feeling as when I accidentally walked in on Lavender having sex with a boy. Uh oh.

I tried to make the feeling go away, but it only grew as my eyes traveled over his body. I tried to stop looking, but that just made me look more. My body was tingling all over.

I thought about kissing him. It made me feel all giggly and excited. I couldn't help it.

So what was the worst that could happen. We kiss and it turns out he was just trying to get me into bed, I could obliviate him, and no one would have to know. Besides, I'd never felt this so strongly, and it could only help me relax. I have been stressed out alot with only four months away from OWLs. Maybe this could be good for me.

I decided to skip the con list and stood up. I walked slowly over to him, suddenly nervous, never having kissed someone for real where it led on to something else.

He looked at me questioningly. He was about to say something, until I placed my lips against his. He didn't know how to respond, so I patiently waited until his lips were moving against mine. He seemed cautious, but that was okay, I needed to start slow too.

Finally, I could almost see his resolve break as his tongue worked for entry to my mouth. After allowing this, we battled for awhile, sometimes moaning when the feeling of plesaure waved over us.

I crawled onto his lap so i could wrap my arms around his neck, and his around my waist. I thought this was great until I felt something poking my nether region. I moaned and leaned into him, pushing against it, until I sat up straight and froze.

"What's wrong?" He said when I pulled away.

What was wrong? I was making out with Draco Malfoy, who had just raped me.

He seemed to read my thoughts, and gently pushed me off onto the couch next to him, and scooted away.

"I'm sorry, I should've had more self-control." He said.

"What? I came onto you."

"Yes but you're kind of vulnerable right now. Maybe you're succumbing to stockholm syndrome or something. Either way it's wrong. Whether you say so or not, you have a boyfriend. Or at least Ron certainly thinks so. He parades it around the whole school when you aren't there."

That one line somehow made me angry, horny, and overcome by how surprisingly sweet this fucked up guy was being. So I had to sit there for a moment in shock while I decided which emotion to let out first.

"He what? Well I tell you what that is going to change real soon. Oh he is so going to pay for that and... hey! I do not have stockholm syndrome, I just wanted something to relax. It's not my fault you turn me on more than anyone ever has, even if you are Draco fucking Malfoy!"

He seemed surprised when I said he turned me on, but his eyes darkened at the end of my sentence.

"What's that supposed to mean? You think he's better than me? He's filth, and so are you, you filthy little mudblood!" He grabbed his wand from atop the fireplace. "Cr..."

"No!" He stopped. "Please Draco, I just wanted you so bad, and I just got so angry."

He dropped his wand. Then he dropped himself onto his knees. He was really falling appart here. Something made me wonder if we were both insane.

Of course his eyes got that sad, guilty, almost puppy dog look in them, and made me scoot to where he was kneeling.

"Draco..." He whispered. "You called me Draco."

"Yes I did." I whispered. The feeling had come back. I declared that, yes, we were both insane and, yes, I still wanted him.

I grabbed his chin and made him look into my eyes. Then I kissed him.

...

A/N: Anyone else notice I like to end chapters when people are kissing? Anyways, I'm dont for today, but I'll try again tomorow if I get any computer time. Remember I love reviews whether I deserve them or not. :)


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Sadness. I'd do the whole demading reviews thing, but since I never know when I'll have computer access to write another chapter. Even if it's just a smiley face, I'd love reviews.

Chapter 6 Yay!

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Insanity. Lust. Confusion. Who the hell knew what exactly was telling me that I wanted this. I knew this was wrong. In fact, I knew that this was the worst person ever to kidnap me.

I'd read about Stockholm syndrome. It was where hostages express empathy and have positive feelings towards their captors, sometimes to the point of defending them. These feelings are generally considered irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims, who essentially mistake a lack of abuse from their captors for an act of kindness.

But abuse definately wasn't lacking here. So apparently I really was just insane.

But these thoughts quickly slipped away as his soft lips massaged mine. I knew we should stop. Well, I guess I really didn't or else I wouldn't be in his arms, being carried over to the bed.

Maybe being stuck in my nerdy rut was getting to me. Being a teacher's pet and a good little girl was secretly boring, a secret not even I knew. And now I was acting out, trying to avoid thinking of the consequences. Part of me knew they were coming, there was no way to avoid that. I just didn't know they would be coming so soon.

Draco's body was pressing protectively over me. It felt safe. It felt warm. It felt _good_. I could've stayed like that forever.

Unfortunately, that didn't happen. I felt his lips slide down to my neck. As I gasped, my eyes fluttered open, I saw something in the doorway that flooded me with guilt, shock, and terror.

"Ron!" I half-shouted, half-moaned as Draco sucked on my neck.

Draco's face contorted with hurt and anger.

"Did you just scream Ron fucking Weasley's name while I pleasured you!" He yelled. I felt his fist connect with my cheek, then his other to my stomach. I felt his tears on my neck. and mine on my nose. Another punch, then we heard "Get your filthy ferret hands off her!"

I knew who it was. I had tried to warn Draco. I had screamed his name, not out of pleasure, but of horror and fear.

My boyfriend Ron Weasley was standing by the door, next to a house elf I knew to the name Silver. And they had seen draco beating me. We were both screwed.

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A/N: Sorry short chapter. I thought I would have like two more hours alone, but it was only like twenty minutes. I'm sorry to all, but I know I'll have time tomorow, so tune in tomorow or something like that. (Sorry)


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Wow tomorrow was really long huh? Well i finally finished my other fic, so i can semi focus on this one and my other works in progress. Sorry for the extremely long wait and sorry for those who don't understand the words "don't like, don't read" lol.

Well for all who understand what they're getting themselves into... enjoy! Chapter 7 finally here :)

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So here I am, sitting in my bed with the curtains closed, hiding from Ginny. She was babysitting me.

I was trying to decide whether I was pissed about Ron not trusting me, or relieved because it really was for the best.

The tear tracks down my cheeks had long since dried, leaving my face salty and dry. My thoughts were unmanageable, never staying on one topic for even a second.

"Hermione?" I heard Ginny whisper, "It's been a whole day. Why don't you tell me what happened. If you want I won't tell Ron, or Harry. I'll make up some story. But Hermione, I'm so worried about you. You're one of my best friends, why don't you talk aboutt it. You might feel better."

I heard her slide open the curtain behind me slowly, trying not to be pushy. The bed sank where she lay down next to me. I tried to decide whether I could pretend to be asleep or not. Eventually I rolled over to face her. I wanted to tell somebody. I wanted to tell her everything and get it off my chest.

So I did. I told her about him knocking me out and waking up in the Room of Requirement. I told her about his violence and anger. I couldn't help but cry. I did my best to tell about is confusing declaration of love and kindness towards Dobby. When I got to the end she was crying too. She never interuppted me, only grabbed my hand and squeezed it.

She grabbed me and hugged me close, letting me sob into her shoulder for awhile. It felt good to have someone I knew loved me hold me so close.

After I cried myself out, she faced me and wiped my cheeks. She looked into my eyes and asked, "And you love him?"

The question knocked me off guard. "Wha... What?"

She sighed and looked into my eyes. "Hermione, I've known you since I was eleven years old. That may not be a lifetime, but it's long enough to know you. Know who you are. Look, you've seen him be a nice guy, you've seen him be... sort of a loving guy. And most of all, you're curious as hell. You want to see what would happen." She smiled and stroked my hair.

"It may not be the smartest thing for you to do, but you've seen something no one else has seen. I know your brain is telling you to stay away, and that's probably what you should do. And your heart is saying go see what happens, that you can change him, that if he really loves you, it could work."

"So do I follow my head or my heart?" I whispered to her.

"That's up to you Hermione. You have to decide if you're brave enough to face him, and your friends, and basically everybody. That's just how it is. And I know it sucks."

"That's an understatement." I giggled. It felt weird.

"Let's go to sleep, you can think it over and decide tomorow." She whispered, stroking my hair again.

I nodded and snuggled under my sheets. I could figure things out tomorrow.

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A/N: Well I know that was a really sappy, no action chapter. I'm going to try to write more, but I know better than to make garuntees. Hope you enjoyed it! :)


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: So I still don't have my own computer with internet. I'm very sad and lonely without it. Two and a half very long years without. So please forgive my late updates. I'm working on some new one-shots right now, but none of them are very far along.

I had a great idea for this story so I just had to write it down. Get ready for guilty-angsty!Draco. Here's chapter 8!

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I was shaken awake by Ginny. She had a scary serious look on her face that sent a wave of terror through me.

I glanced at the alarm clock out of habit to see we were late to class. Oh, that makes sense.

"Ginny calm down and get to class. I need another day in bed." I finally felt a little better after last night, but still wasn't ready to see Malfoy in class.

Ginny shook her head. "That's not it. Get dressed we have a big problem."

The look on her face was enough to make me jump out of bed and find my clothes.

"Skip the shower, we have to get to the astronomy tower as fast as we can." She said urgently, finding a brush, and clumsily brushing my hair as I tugged on my skirt.

"Blaise in downstairs about to rip the Fat Lady's portrait down."

"Ginny what is going on!" I yelled as we entered the common room and running straight across it.

We burst through the door, and the first thing I saw was Blaise pacing back and forth, his face close to pure terror. When he saw me, his face turned to a cross of relief and rage.

Before I could ask him why he was so angry, Ginny took my arm, and the three of us ran to the other side of the castle.

"Malfoy is trying to kill himself." Blaise said through clenched teeth.

If Ginny hadn't still been pulling my arm, I would've stopped in my tracks. Malfoy? Why would he do that?

"After last night, he told me all about what happened in that room. what he did. He was freaking out all day. he was up all night and when I woke up there was a note on his bed. I read up to the part saying he was on the astronomy tower and ran after him. He had a bottle of firewhiskey, half empty, and was just about to jump. I stopped him and we got in a fight."

I looked over to see bruises forming on his face and his lip was bleeding. I hadn't seen it before.

"I petrified him and came to get you, hoping you would want to help stop him."

Want to? Why would that be a question?

I felt stupid when my mind answered _because he raped you._

But even remembering the horrible things he did to me, I didn't want him to die. Even with all that, he didn't deserve to die this way. No, I couldn't find it in me to even hate him. All I wanted was to stop this.

We were climbing the steps, and I was still fighting myself, trying to find my real thoughts and be able to justify them. The thing was the only thing that I was really thinking was _He can't die He can't die I need to know for sure if it's true I love Do I love I love He can't die I need to know if I love I love him._

I didn't love him. I knew that, but I couldn't help thinking it. I had no way to justify any of these thoughts, no reasons why I could possibly wan't to save him, but I did. So I kept running until we were through the door and staring into the bright morning sun.

And there was Draco, lying on his side, stiff after the _petrificus totalus_ curse he recieved.

Blaise and I hurried to his side to see his eyes opened. He looked over to Blaise and sighed. His eyes closed again.

"Blaise, just leave me in peace."

Blaise shook his head. "Draco, you know I'll never leave you alone until you tell me you are done trying to do something this stupid."

"Fine, I'm done trying to kill myself."

"Okay, I'm not going to leave until I believe you when you say that."

Draco sighed and rolled to his stomach, almost touching me. I was too scared to speak yet, my brain still whirling and fighting and just being messed the fuck up.

"Look," Draco sighed again and rested his forehead against the cold stone. "You know what I did, I don't see why you're trying to stop me."

"Because you are my best friend. We grew up together. And though I'm a Slytherin and not supposed to admit it, I do love you."

"Yes Blaise, and I love you too. You are my brother. But there's no point in living if everybody hates me except one person, who will leave me after Hogwarts to get married, probably move to Italy and be all Italian. Besides I'm only doing this because I'm a coward. I can't face her. I can't face anyone. I can't even face myself. Please, brother, just let me go in peace, so I don't have to deal with the judging looks I see, not just in public, but when I look in the mirror. I just can't stand it." A tear slid down onto the floor, darkening a spot of stone.

I couldn't stand it anymore. That look of pain on his face. That tear, probably the first since he was a kid. I had to say something.

"NO! No, Draco you can't!"

He jerked up onto his knees, then to his feet in surprise. His face was guarded, like we were there to kill him ourselves.

He saw Ginny and his face darkened. "So Blaise, I see you decided to tell the entire school to come stop me." He felt around in his pockets. "Blaise, what the hell did you do to my wand?"

"I took it. And don't bother looking, I sent it down to my room and locked it in my chest that only opens for me."

Draco looked betrayed. Then his face darkened, like when I pissed him off back in the Room of Requirement. I took a few steps back to Ginny, blocking her with my body.

"Go ahead and protect her. I could still kill you both with my bare hands. So you better hurry and kill me before I decide o fight back."

I took a step back, my mouth opened in surprise. He _did_ think we had come to kill him.

"No, Draco. I came to stop you from doing this."

He scoffed and turned to Blaise. "Who else have you told?"

"No one. Not even the first year I asked to go get Hermione, and ended up getting Ginny instead."

Draco just shook his head and turned away from all of us, looking out at the grounds below.

"Draco, you need to stop this. Draco I... I... I forgive you."

And in one moment, I knew I had meant it. I had completely forgiven him. Even though I had counted three places where I would have scars. Even though he had taken my innocence in such a brutal way. I had forgiven him. Relief washed through my body as the weight that had held me down was lifted.

However that relief was short lived. I saw Malfoy's face continue to scowl at me like I was his worst nightmare.

"You bitch. You don't even know what you're saying. I've been obsessed with you for five years, watching you, falling in love with you. The fights I picked with you were just so I could see you up close instead of from afar. I finally decide to do something about it by raping you. How the fuck could you forgive me. I've done nothing but hurt you." His voice cracked at the end. He turned and punched the wall nearest to him, pure stone.

I whimpered when I saw blood on his knuckles as he shook his hand out.

"Draco, that's not true."

He started to talk, but I had had enough. He just wouldn't listen to anyone, and I was getting mad, even though I knew that was a horrible idea.

I stalked up to him and yelled "You are so stupid. No wonder you don't have any friends but Blaise. You don't listen to a fucking word said to you do you? Guess what, you didn't just hurt me, you made me feel alive. Something I never felt with Krum or Ron or for Melin's sake even Harry. You showed me a side of you that I don't even think Blaise has seen." I couldn't think of anything more to say, so I turned around and stomped back to Ginny.

I turned back to see Draco had sat on the edge of the tower, staring at the floor. His hands worked over his broken knuckles.

Blaise was staring at me like I was crazy, or maybe I was crazy.

I took a huge breath and leaned against the wall behind me, and sunk to the ground. It wasn't enough. I still couldn't breathe. I looked at Ginny, who was looking at me with concern.

"Hermione, go get some air. I'll stay up here and keep an eye on things."

I knew she didn't mean that too literally, considering this was a place you would go to get air. She knew I needed to leave, to calm down. To think. I needed to think.

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A/N: what do you think? This part wasn't in the old story, but I like how it portrays how guilty he feels, yet he doesn't just change character overnight, he stays himself. Tell me what you guys think please!


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: I really like that last chapter. I'm going to try to keep up the good work. It'll probably take me awhile to get another chapter up after this. I'll try my best, but I have alot to do this week.

Anyway, here's chapter 9. All those still with me, enjoy!

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I needed to breathe. I ran down the steps of the astronomy tower, not stopping until I hit the bottom. I sat down on the bottom step and tried not to cry.

Why did he have to be like this. Why did he have to do what he did. He fucked this all up, now I have no idea what to do.

I rested my head against the wall behind me. I still couldn't breathe. My head felt like splitting open. My lips were chapped and splitting. My legs hurt from running so much so early. But...

But it didn't hurt _there_. The one place it should hurt, where he split her in two, where he took her- it didn't hurt. He had healed her, she remembered. He had cried. He had said she loved her.

Then she figured it out. She needed him to prove it. That was the reason she couldn't stop thinking about him. She was curious if he really meant what he said.

But how to prove it. He already kissed her. He already made her feel good, even if she had been barking mad when it happened.

She stood and ran back up the stairs, regretting having ran down so far.

When she came back to the top of the tower, everything was the same, except Malfoy was begging Blaise to fix the smashed bottle of firewhiskey he had dropped during their fight. She watched as Blaise magiced the bottle together, but purposely kept it empty. Draco resmashed it.

"Draco!" I called to him.

He looked up at me, his expression very mixed, like he couldn't decide how he felt.

I wanted to talk to him away from Blaise and Ginny, but I knew Blaise wouldn't allow Draco out of his sight right now.

She waved Draco over, and motioned Ginny to stand by Blaise. They were close enough to run over if something happened, but far enough they wouldn't be able to hear if they whispered.

When Draco came, he stood in front of her, purposefully staring at the ground.

"Draco, do you love me?"

His body stiffened. He hesitated, debating about actually speaking or not.

"Yes. Yes I do."

He sounded so sincere, she almost believed him right away.

"Then why are you doing this? If you really loved someone, you would stay alive, just for that tiny, miniscule, so close to impossible that you have a better chance of shitting a flying rainbow pig that shoots lazers from it's eyes, chance that you could ever be together."

He looked at Hermione like she was that flying pig, but then sighed and sat down against a wall. Hermione sat next to him, making sure Ginny and Blaise could still see them.

"You know why I'm doing this. Well, I guess I can't say that anymore, I seriously doubt that it's happening tonight. But you know why I tried. And I will keep trying until I am gone. There's another reason why I want to end it. You will never move on until I'm gone. But if I'm out of the picture, you can live your life, get married to Ron, get a job as a healer, whatever you want to do. But while I'm still here, you will never be able to get that one night out of your head."

She closed her eyes, not trusting herself to talk yet. Why couldn't he just stop.

"Draco, just stop feeling sorry for yourself. You know your not doing this for me, because I will move one. Trust me, if I want to, I can move on. I could obliviate myself or have sex with a bunch of guys or do it the healthy way by joining a lot of activities and just forgetting with time. I don't want Ron, I've never wanted him. Just give it up already, just stop. It's obvious you don't love me."

Hermione went to get up and leave, but he pulled her back down. His lips were on her with no hesitation. She put a hand up in the other's direction, so they knew she had it under control.

She kissed him back patiently, but after while pushed him back gently. She was a little surprised when he went back so willingly.

"You think just because you kiss someone that means you love them? I kissed Viktor Krum, but I never loved him. That proves nothing."

He scoffed at her, but didn't move away. He didn't know what to do now.

"So how can you prove it to me Draco?" She added a little smile,hoping it would prompt him to think of something.

Draco put his head in his hands and sighed. Alist was already forming in his mind of ways to prove he loved her. That he watched her anytime she was in the same room. The fact that he dreamed of her nine nights out of ten. That he was mesmerized when she saw her smile. Her eyes, her lips, her hair, her nose, her arms, legs, chest, feet, teeth, cheeks, everything. He loved everything about her.

But could he expose himself to her like that? His father would laugh and beat him unconscious if he knew he was even considering telling someone about his feelings in this way.

It was Hermione. She was right. There was still that tiny, miniscule, so small-something-about-a-freaky-ass-pig chance that something would happen. And that's why he couldn't do that, and had to do this.

As he spoke of watching her and his dreams of her and nights he woke up crying because she wasn't lying next to him, he saw his father. And by the end he had started to stutter and was frightened.

"My father can't find out I just said all that. No he can't hear of any of this. He would kill me. God, he would beat me, then kill me."

"Why does that matter, I thought you were going to kill yourself." Blaise said quietly. Draco hadn't noticed the other two had stepped closer during his confession.

"I won't, I can't. I have to face it. I can't run away from all my problems." Draco whispered.

Hermione smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you Draco."

And she believed him, just like that. She didn't know why, but she knew he meant every single word. She wouldn't tell anybody else, and she would make sure Harry and Ron and Ginny would never tell anybody, so Draco's parents would never know.

"Come on, you guys are going to get in trouble for missing class, and I'm in desperate need of more sleep." Hermione said, helping Draco to his feet.

Hermione still hadn't decided on her feelings for Draco, but she would help him do this. He told her later that he wanted to be a better person, and had started a wizard version of anger management. It involved exercise, a counseling program, and a few calming potions in case he needed them. She wanted to help, and she joined too, knowing she was a very temperamental person.

Three months later, they were much better at handling their rage. Hermione had decided to give a secret relationship with Draco a try. They had become friends, and she wanted to see if it might just work.

Hermione joined a program for people who had been raped and told her and Draco's story. Some people were happy that her story ended so well, but others thought she was insane and shouldn't be there. She didn't care what people thought, and just tried to help out some of the others with advice and friendship. However, some of the people who didn't like that she was dating Draco signed a petition and kicked her out.

After that she joined a hotline for people who were raped in her spare time.

Draco was always looking for ways to make it up to Hermione. He bought her presents despite her saying her forgiveness could not be bought. He wrote her letters and surprisingly good poetry. He even gave her foot rubs whenever she asked for them.

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A/N: What do you guys think? Is it a good ending? I'm debating about writing a sequel taking place after they start dating where his dad finds out and bad things happen.

I know the ending is way different than the original version, but I think I like this way more.

Tell me what you think or give me ideas on how to improve. I hope you enjoyed! JJJJJ


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